Uh

I wake up already tired

All of the magic is gone from this mattress

and it's Not the kind of tired that sleep can fix

it's the kind that lives behind the eyes

And all of my secrets were turned into captions

Everything keeps moving

Voices, days, expectations

And I’m standing there

I'm savage

I am

Like something inside me already left

I don’t feel broken

I feel… drained

Days turn into weeks and months

Like a cup that’s been refilled too many times

on repeat

And it's a shame

I smile on instinct

I answer when spoken to

But there’s a hollow space

Where my weight used to be

I gave pieces without counting

Time, patience, faith

And one day I noticed

Every step's a step

Through a pool of blood

I know it's obvious

I don't give a fuck

There was nothing left to give

Silence doesn’t scare me anymore

It matches how I feel

I don't give a fuck

Drunk on devil juice

I don't need no help

I look in the mirror

Wide

Flat

Empty

is all I see

I'm a million miles away

I'm lost inside my brain

I’m not asking to be saved

I’m just naming it

So it stops owning me

It's always been the same

There's nothing in my veins

I'm tryin' to stay awake

But maybe I should stay

Tell me you know me

This is what it feels like

Say it ain't so

To still be here

It's harder to hear when I'm near

And somehow

I already know

All that I am is

Already gone

All that I've been

I haven't been lately

is A little lost

is A little found

It takes one to know one

But I don't know myself

And I'm so afraid of the light

That I dim my own shine

And the truth is I can't tell