Cold metal to the skin.
Dim overhead lights.
Ballistol multi-purpose oil.

Clear the chamber,
cycle the action,
clip's out, strap unhitched.
Stock and pistol grip
bolt assembly,
all laid out.

Grab a two by two inch cloth,
squirt ballistol down the barrel.
Motherfucker gonna get cleaned.

Barrel's clean and shining,
bolt assembly next.
Separate bolt head, locking piece, firing pin and spring.
Lean back and light a Marlboro.

Reassemble it all again,
a fine piece of german engineering.
Beats the plastic toys of today.

Grab the camo jacket,
camo pants, and army boots.
Five AM, about time.
Grab keys, backpack, and rifle.

Pickup rumbling down the road,
Pulling off onto a dirt road.
Gonna hike for an hour,
Hot damn, I'm excited!

Rack it,
Chamber another round.
Seven point sixty two by fifty one.
The best there is.
I'm going hunting for two-legged moose.

There's one coming up the trail.
can hear him before he appears.
Check the rangefinder, and dial in.

Three city dwelling moose,
one of them with an antler cap.
All carry beer and bags of food
Yeah, this is what I came for.

Line up the sight, pull the trigger.
Antler cap disintegrates.
Next one hits a kneecap,
man, that's gotta hurt like a motherfucker.

Last one goes down with a scream
Collect the brass, and walk over to them
Grab their beer and leave, sayin'
"Y'all better not litter in my part of the woods"

Rack it,
Chamber another round.
Seven point sixty two by fifty one.
The best there is.
I'm ridding the world of two legged moose.