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Certified Hood Classic

stoner, dub, hip-hop, 90s hip-hop, catchy hooks, west coast hip hop, 70s, retro funk, Transformer Scratch, Chirp Scratch, Crab Scratch

TripS·2:29

Lyrics

🎙️**[INTRO - Spoken Word / Skit Style]**
(static noise, cassette loading sound)
Oh hi! Hello, hi! Hello there! Hi!
Are you there? Can you hear me? Can you see me?
Are you listening to music right now?
Of course you are, silly me… HA HA HA!

You— I really like rap music…
Wait, you do too?! What a totally unexpected lucky turn!
Alright, alright, alright—I won’t bother you any longer,
Hope ya enjoy the track and don’t forget to leave a like!

(record scratch)
LET’S GOOOOO!

🎶**[VERSE 1]**
Yo I slide in the beat like toast in a slot,
Mic in my hand, and the rhymes still hot.
Woke up this mornin’ with nothin’ to do,
So I freestyled my breakfast—now my eggs rap too.

I moonwalk in socks, got grooves in my shoes,
Dropped a bar so hard, now it’s front-page news.
I spit like a llama that’s learnin’ kung fu,
And my brain got Wi-Fi, how ‘bout you?

🎵**[HOOK]**
Don't forget to leave a like (hey!),
Bounce your head left, bounce it right (okay!)
If you smile, you’re doin’ it right,
Now clap with the beat like day and night!

Silly me! I forgot my name,
But I still got bars and a goofy brain.
I rap like cartoons on a sugar high,
With a boom bap beat and a pizza pie!

🎶**[VERSE 2]**
Put a kazoo in the booth, now it’s soundin’ legit,
My goldfish heard the verse and said “This a hit!”
I freestyle in the shower with a duck on my head,
And I rhyme so fresh, even Siri said “Daaaamn.”

I’m glitchin’ in the Matrix wearin’ Crocs and shades,
Moon cheese bars with a side of Kool-Aid.
My swag outdated like floppy disks,
But my dance moves hit like disco kicks!

🎵**[HOOK]**
Don't forget to leave a like (yo!),
Do the robot, ride a bike (woo!)
If your grandma nods, it’s certified,
Now vibe with the beat like “Ay yi yi!”

Silly me! I'm a pixel prince,
Wrote this rhyme on a Game Boy since.
It’s dumb, it’s fun, it’s wiggly tight,
Now comment below if I’m rappin’ alright!

🎙️**[OUTRO - Spoken Word / Goofy voice]**
Okay okay okay!
That was—amazing.
You laughed? You cried?
You danced like a squirrel on a trampoline??
You better leave a like, buddy! Or I’m tellin’ your toaster!
(weird alien sound)
Alright peace out—catch ya on the flip disk!

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