Hatred settles where love used to throb

I press my fingers into nothing, and still

it leaves a mark. The collar’s down—

but everything points up. I swallow

glass without shatter. I peel

myself back, all soft and spiked.

(Shell off… touch touch… no echo)

I walk like I’m reversing. The dusk

starts speaking in pulses. I pour

out of myself, into air, into

someone else’s outline. Fullness

makes me sick. Hunger, clean.

The rhythm is hollow and I live in it.

(Drip back… step wrong… walk walk)

The fire doesn’t sting anymore

We’re frost with heat trapped underneath

Everything I was—tight fists,

now just a shape I wear

to remind me I’m still here

when I’m not.

(Like me—numb me—numb me)

(numb me—um me?—ghost)

Mmmm

I ache for silence and it screams

I am holes and I’m too full

Give me too much and I empty

Give me nothing and I spill

I want the edge of it

just the edge

We open each other like wounds

not out of cruelty—but recognition

Somewhere between

sipping thirst

and digging bone

we found comfort in the pain

(Lost-first, first-lost... bones bones bones...)

Let me un-fill

Let me ghost

I am underneath and overdone

Madness, maybe

but it holds me

like home never did

(Sadness… sadness…take this…)