Tin-smile minister on the daytime show

Sells fresh fear in a second-hand suit

Wave that briefcase, wave that grin

Signed in blood on a budget bin

Empty words on a million screens

Big red bus and it smells like lies

Same old party, brand-new mask

Shake your hand then they raise your tax

Here comes the plastic flag parade

Wave it, wave it, look well-behaved

They point, we pay, they preach, we fade

All hail the plastic flag parade

Stand up, sit down, do as you’re told

Promise you heaven, pick your pockets cold

They chant “freedom” while they tighten the chain

Sing for the plastic flag parade again

Backbench hero with a borrowed brain

Quote dead books to explain your pain

Blame your neighbor, bless the crown

Kick you once then they pat you down

Tea-time terror on the evening news

Strong-jaw anchors reading scripted views

“Hard decisions” from a leather chair

“Austerity” means they do not care

Here comes the plastic flag parade

Wave it, wave it, look well-behaved

They point, we pay, they preach, we fade

All hail the plastic flag parade

Sing loud, sing wrong, tear at the cage

Write their names on a ripped-up page

If truth’s a joke in a rigged campaign

Spit on the plastic flag parade (no shame)

Who guards the guards when the guards get paid?

Who counts the votes in the blackout shade?

If every choice is the same old trade

Red tie, blue tie, same upgrade

Here comes the plastic flag parade

Wave it, break it, set it to flame

They point, we laugh, they choke on the blame

Goodbye, plastic flag parade

Shout once, shout twice, don’t obey

Crowd in the street like it’s judgment day

If they’re the storm, then we’re the rain

Wash out the plastic flag parade