Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom…

Ever seen a hundred fifty brooms stacked up?

Even that apprentice with nothing, then his wand acts up?

Don’t that magic make you happy?

Don’t that stardust make you snappy?

Oh it don’t? That’s suspicious… (tsk tsk tsk!)

I know fairies out here runnin’ from wishes. (whoosh!)

I’m not into what these goblins are into,

I knew that since I was young singing with Baloo

On Arendelle Street, didn’t budge when trolls confronted me,

Earned Mushu’s respect, now we do dim sum on sundeez!

What you willin’ to fight for? Me? A churro stick!

Or the last Dole Whip swirl at the Magic Kingdom quick!

Fiddle-faddle your idols! I’ve got no fairy godmothers,

Just jazz hands, pixie dust, and seven cool brothers.

Ever seen a hundred fifty cupcakes stack up? (yum)

Ever seen a mouse with no cheese glow up? (squeak ching)

Don’t that magic make you happy? (sing, birdies, sing!)

Don’t that sparkle make you snazzy? (Uh-huh, jazzy!)

Oh it don’t? That’s suspicious…

I know witches dodgin’ spells like magicians. (abracadabra!)

Money on the line goes BREEENG BRANG—like a wishing well,

Threw a nickel in, got Gaston’s number, oh well!

Been lit since flip books, when the pages came alive,

Now I’m moonwalkin’ on a carpet — Aladdin, YOU drive!

Need a chef in the kitchen like Lumière on fire,

“Be Our Ghest,” but he naked in an apron, oh my! (ooh là là)

Broad see me fly, but I’m goofy with it too,

Mickey ears on my head, singin’ “Hot Dog” to the crew

Is you happy for me or nah? (nahhh)

Either way, I’m scattin’ on ya!

Enemies frown, but my wand goes brrrah

I cast jazz hands — Bibbidi-bobbidi-POW!

Gold ain’t everything, but broke’s a curse,

Try buyin’ one ride ticket, then they upsell merch.

Envelope thick like a spellbook wallet,

Magic carpet Uber — yeah, the genie called it.

I’m bargainin’ still, even with a hunnid mills,

“Yo Fairy Godmother, can you coupon clip these thrills?”

Animal side wild, croc bite don’t heal,

But I’m dancin’ with the villains rockin’ glass high heels.

Ever seen a hundred fifty pixie jars light up?

Ever seen a prince with no crown glow up? (ding ding, ching!)

Don’t that magic make you happy? (yes it dooo!)

Don’t that wonder make you snappy? (snap, snap, snazzy!)

Oh it don’t? That’s suspicious…

I know ogres duckin’ ballads like magicians.

“Aw gee, kids… that’s real magic!”