Mrs. Claus Got A Fat Ass
Vintage 1950s soul band in a live room, brushed drums and upright bass walking heavy. Baritone male vocals, deep and raspy, start in a half-whisper and rise into a gritty belt on the hook. Horn stabs answer the vocal phrases; piano comps tight rhythmic chords. Background doo-wop harmonies swell on the choruses, tambourine and handclaps lifting the groove into a rowdy, church-meets-juke-joint Christmas jam., soul, beats, rhythmic, deep
Mrs. Claus Got A Fat Ass
Vintage 1950s soul band in a live room, brushed drums and upright bass walking heavy. Baritone male vocals, deep and raspy, start in a half-whisper and rise into a gritty belt on the hook. Horn stabs answer the vocal phrases; piano comps tight rhythmic chords. Background doo-wop harmonies swell on the choruses, tambourine and handclaps lifting the groove into a rowdy, church-meets-juke-joint Christmas jam., soul, beats, rhythmic, deep
Lyrics
Intro
whispered vocals
Snow fallin’ slow
But the block still packed
Red suit
White fur
And she got that back
Verse 1
We in the North Pole lounge
Candy cane lights on the wall
Santa playin’ cards in the corner
But she the main show of it all
Hot cocoa steam in the kitchen
She walk by
I lose my place
Apron tied tight on that figure
Christmas came early to my face
Chorus
Mrs. Claus got a fat ass
Lord
Have mercy
Look at that
Round like a holiday wreath
Got me prayin’ on my knees
Talkin’ smack
Mrs. Claus got a fat ass
Sleigh bells jump when she pass
Snow start shakin’ off the roof
Every time she move that back
Verse 2
She hummin’ old church carols
Hip swing
Peppermint sway
Cookie sheet clap like cymbals
Every little step she take my way
She say
“Baby
Want a biscuit?”
I say
“I want all that plate”
She laugh
That laugh so wicked
Got my halo showin’ up late
Chorus
Bridge
low vocal register
North Side
South Side
Elves outside
All freeze when she slide
Jelly jars wobblin’
Clock hands stoppin’
Whole damn workshop wide-eyed
crescendo
She bend
She twist
That list I’m on
Ain’t nice
But it feel so right
She clap one time
That gift unwrap
Merry Christmas for the night
Chorus