In a world... where every movie trailer

Starts the exact same way...

One man...

One destiny...

One unnecessarily dramatic electric guitar riff...

In a world where clichés reign supreme,

Where explosions solve everything, if you know what I mean.

There’s a lone wolf hero, yeah, he plays by his own rules,

But deep down, he’s just a guy with amazing abs and cool tools.

He’s got a tragic backstory (his dog was taken!)

He’s got a car that explodes (for no reason!)

And don’t forget the love interest, who only speaks...

...in vague mysterious tones!

In a world where trailers never change,

Where villains monologue and cars burst into flames,

One hero will rise... one hero will fight...

And one audience will ask... why is this guy so ripped overnight?!

A deep voice narrator guides us through,

Droppin’ lines like "This summer... this hero... will finally know the truth."

There's a hacker named Kevin, who types really fast,

And a villain who whispers "You’re already too late" at last!

Coming this fall... to a theater near you...

Prepare for a movie... so forgettable...

You'll swear you've seen it before... AND YOU HAVE.

In a world where logic don’t apply,

Where running from explosions means you never die,

One song will mock... one song will laugh...

And one executive will greenlight a sequel in a flash!

This summer… get ready… for the greatest… most unnecessary… most EXPLOSIVE…

…song about movie trailers EVER.

{END}