[Intro - comedic storytelling tone]
okay, so technically…
the casino said “lifetime ban”
but nowhere in the paperwork did it specify which lifetime
I have a time machine, so, suck it
Dave is currently yelling “ooga” at the navigation system again
Stompington is threatening to file a formal complaint against space itself
And I think we’re heading toward Earth
unless I’m misreading the stars again… that happens sometimes..

[hard synthwave-metal transition]

[Verse 1, driving synth bass, punchy drums, playful energy, male vocals]
four hundred twenty lightyears out past anywhere I know
dashboard flickering like a cheap casino
ship smells weird but I’m not asking why
Dave just yelled “ooga” at a cop ship flying by
we stopped at a truck stop back around Neptune
that was a long time ago, I stopped keeping track
Dave disappeared for a while like he always does
came back with a live chicken and a carton of moon smokes
Stompington’s losing his prehistoric cool
threatening extinction over broken air conditioning units
buddy we lost the left door three systems ago
if the engine stops screaming that’s how we know something’s wrong

[Chorus]
four hundred twenty lightyears from home
windows down in the asteroid smoke
ship held together by duct tape and hope
still somehow flying, still somehow stoned
four hundred twenty lightyears from home
wrong turn somewhere past Orion’s glow
engine light on but we’re still gonna roll
four hundred twenty lightyears from home

[Verse 2, funkier bass groove]
we stopped for snacks at a sketchy asteroid mall
Dave yelled “ooga” and licked the bathroom wall (ew!)
pretty sure he got engaged to something in there
honestly I don’t have the energy to care
Stompington started crashing out again
talking about standards and vehicular negligence
meanwhile I’m kicking the fuel gauge with my boot
praying real hard and adjusting the aux input
got a black hole sitting right beside the road
gps just says bro I honestly don’t know
every warning light turned on at once tonight
but if I cover them with tape they disappear from sight

[Chorus]
four hundred twenty lightyears from home
windows down in the asteroid smoke
ship held together by duct tape and hope
still somehow flying, still somehow stoned
four hundred twenty lightyears from home
wrong turn somewhere past Orion’s glow
engine light on but we’re still gonna roll
four hundred twenty lightyears from home

[Breakdown]
now the ship is making noises it has never made before
Dave is yelling “ooga” while he fights the cargo door
Stompington is staring at me like I ruined his life
and something in the vents just asked me for advice
I don’t know where we are
but we are not going home yet

[Final Chorus]
four hundred twenty lightyears from home
windows down in the asteroid smoke
ship held together by duct tape and hope
still somehow flying, still somehow stoned
four hundred twenty lightyears from home
wrong turn somewhere past Orion’s glow
engine light on but we’re still gonna roll
four hundred twe