Intro:

They say you pay for what you lean on…

I guess I found out.

Instrumental break:

Verse 1:

I laugh like I’m okay,

but it shakes

‘Cause I keep thinking of all the faces I can’t bring back

Mom and Dad are gone,

my grandparents too

Friends went quiet like they never knew

My sister didn’t make it,

my brother left me young

Now it’s just me,

and the nights feel long

I talk to the ceiling,

I talk to the dark

Like maybe they can hear me where they are

Hook:

Live by the sword,

die by the sword

That line hits hard when you’re broke inside

I’ve been holding my “drugs”

like it’s something I can trust

And yeah,

it helps…

but it costs too much

If I keep walking this edge,

I know what it could do

So I’m saying it out loud:

I don’t want to lose

Verse 2:

I’ve been using drugs just to get through the day

Just to make the heavy stuff feel far away

It’s the only thing that shuts my head up

For a little while,

I can breathe,

I can rest

Then it fades and I’m right back here

Same cold room,

same hard year

I hate that it owns me,

I hate that it’s true

But when I’m falling,

it’s what I run to

Hook:

Live by the sword,

die by the sword

That line hits hard when you’re broke inside

I’ve been holding my “drugs”

like it’s something I can trust

And yeah, it helps…

but it costs too much

If I keep walking this edge,

I know what it could do

So I’m saying it out loud:

I don’t want to lose

Bridge:

Damn…

I miss them more than I can say

Sometimes I just want to go where they went

But I can’t pretend that’s peace

Not like this

So I’m trying something different tonight

I’ll call someone.

I’ll tell the truth.

I’ll take one step that doesn’t wreck my life

Even if my hands shake when I do

Outro:

Live by the sword,

pay by the sword

I’ve paid enough,

I’m tired,

I’m worn

If I’m still here,

maybe there’s a reason I can’t see

So I’ll hold on

just for tonight

just for me