I wrote a poem on my lunch receipt

I spilled my latte on my pants again

I saw your pic when I was scrolling deep

Then fell asleep with frozen peas on my chin

They say: Get out there and meet someone new

I say: I did! Her dog bit my shoe

They say: Try yoga, man, clear your mind

I say: I tried but I farted - not my kind

I only cried twice today! (only twice!)

Once in the car, and once in line at Subway

I only cried twice today! (that’s a win!)

Even though I miss you and my Wi-Fi password pin

I bought cologne that smells like mountain trees

Now I smell like burnt deodorant and fear

I tried to flirt, said “nice elbows please”

And got banned from the library for a year

She said: You’re kinda sweet but super weird

I said: That’s fair, also I just grew this beard

She said: You’re not my type, I like strong men

I said: Cool, I can open jars… like... now and then?

I only cried twice today! (only twice!)

Once in the tub and once while buying rice

I only cried twice today! (doing fine!)

Even though I called your name at least six times

I’ve got a playlist called “Maybe She’ll Text”

I wear your old hoodie cause... it still connects

I rehearse cool lines while brushing my teeth

Like: “Hey girl, you dropped your dignity!” (wait, what?)

I only cried twice today! (only twice!)

Once in my dreams and once while feeding mice

I only cried twice today! (on the mend!)

Maybe tomorrow I’ll just cry near the end!

I only cried twice today! (only twice!)

Once in my dreams and once while feeding mice

I only cried twice today! (on the mend!)

Maybe tomorrow I’ll just cry near the end!

Just cry near the end!