I need to be honest with you about something because I’ve been holding it in for a long time and pretending it doesn’t hurt me when it actually does. Sometimes I feel really lonely in our friendship. I know you probably don’t always mean to make me feel that way, and I know you have your own life, your own friends, your own problems, and things that matter to you, and I truly try to understand that. I always try to think positively and give reasons for why you don’t answer or why we barely talk sometimes. I defend you a lot, even in my own head. But after a while, it started hurting because I realized I’m usually the one reaching out first, asking to hang out first, checking in first, and sometimes it feels like we only really talk when something bad is happening or when you need help with something. And I don’t want to feel like I only exist in your life when there’s a problem going on. I miss feeling important to you. I miss feeling chosen instead of feeling like I’m standing on the sidelines watching you have a whole different life with everyone else while I’m trying to convince myself not to feel left out. And the thing is, I kept hiding it because I didn’t want to sound dramatic or clingy or selfish. I kept telling myself maybe you were busy or forgot or had more important things going on, and maybe sometimes that’s true. But my feelings are still real even if there are reasons behind things. I care about you a lot, which is why this is so hard for me to say. I’m not trying to fight with you or make you feel bad. I just don’t want to keep pretending I’m okay when I’m not. I want our friendship to feel equal and real and mutual, not like I’m constantly reaching across a distance by myself. I just needed you to know how I’ve honestly been feeling.