
Only When I’m Gone
deathrock, post-punk, industrial minimal, 6/8 time signature, 110 BPM
JohnnyReggae·5:17

5:17
Only When I’m Gone
deathrock, post-punk, industrial minimal, 6/8 time signature, 110 BPM
Creator: JohnnyReggaeRelease Date: April 29, 2026
Lyrics
[Verse]
I stayed awake too long again
So something in me would slip
Edges blur at the corners first
Then the center starts to thin
You never come when I’m intact
You wait for the fracture line
You trace the gaps I try to seal
Then step inside the divide
I felt it once, mistook it for
A presence I could keep
But you don’t touch what stands upright
You enter what can’t speak
[Chorus]
Only when I’m gone
Do you come near
Only when I fade
Do you appear
Hold me in the absence
Keep me undefined
I feel you most
When I’m not mine
[Verse]
I learned the timing of your weight
The hour my body loosens grip
The silence just before you press
Your shape against the split
So I stopped fighting off the drift
Stopped naming what I feel
I let the hours hollow out
What I used to keep real
I stand still when it begins
No movement, no defense
You move through what I leave behind
And call it closeness
[Chorus]
Only when I’m gone
Do you come near
Only when I fade
Do you appear
I open every fracture
I quiet every line
You touch me best
When I’m not mine
[Breakdown]
I don’t call it harm
I don’t call it wrong
It’s the only way
You stay this long
I don’t call it loss
I don’t call it theft
There’s more of you
The less of me is left
“less of me... less of me...”
[Final Chorus]
Only when I’m gone
Do you come near
Only when I fade
Do you appear
Take what I abandon
Fill what I erase
Leave me just enough
To feel your trace
Only when I’m hollow
Only when I break
You are the shape
My absence makes
“gone... fade... break...”
I stayed awake too long again
So something in me would slip
Edges blur at the corners first
Then the center starts to thin
You never come when I’m intact
You wait for the fracture line
You trace the gaps I try to seal
Then step inside the divide
I felt it once, mistook it for
A presence I could keep
But you don’t touch what stands upright
You enter what can’t speak
[Chorus]
Only when I’m gone
Do you come near
Only when I fade
Do you appear
Hold me in the absence
Keep me undefined
I feel you most
When I’m not mine
[Verse]
I learned the timing of your weight
The hour my body loosens grip
The silence just before you press
Your shape against the split
So I stopped fighting off the drift
Stopped naming what I feel
I let the hours hollow out
What I used to keep real
I stand still when it begins
No movement, no defense
You move through what I leave behind
And call it closeness
[Chorus]
Only when I’m gone
Do you come near
Only when I fade
Do you appear
I open every fracture
I quiet every line
You touch me best
When I’m not mine
[Breakdown]
I don’t call it harm
I don’t call it wrong
It’s the only way
You stay this long
I don’t call it loss
I don’t call it theft
There’s more of you
The less of me is left
“less of me... less of me...”
[Final Chorus]
Only when I’m gone
Do you come near
Only when I fade
Do you appear
Take what I abandon
Fill what I erase
Leave me just enough
To feel your trace
Only when I’m hollow
Only when I break
You are the shape
My absence makes
“gone... fade... break...”
