
[v4.5+]《如来神掌,我勉强》Buddha’s Palm, I'm Barely Calm
HI-RES, 432Hz, Eerie, Creepy, Sad, Mandarin experimental rock built entirely on traditional Chinese and ancient Persian-rooted instruments, with erhu-led fractured polyrhythms, shifting odd-time arpeggios on pipa and guzheng, and syncopated Chinese opera percussion driving the pulse, Ancient Persian suona (derived from the Surnay) pierces through the texture with bright, reedy calls, while deep bass tones are created using massive Chinese gongs and layered yunluo chimes instead of any Western bass instruments, Airy whisper harmonics drift above, shimmering synth pads and reversed harp samples fill the spaces between jagged phrases, and occasional glitch fragments shatter the flow, forming a surreal labyrinth where ancestral timbres meet fractured modern rhythms in a dreamlike collision of history and abstraction,

[v4.5+]《如来神掌,我勉强》Buddha’s Palm, I'm Barely Calm
HI-RES, 432Hz, Eerie, Creepy, Sad, Mandarin experimental rock built entirely on traditional Chinese and ancient Persian-rooted instruments, with erhu-led fractured polyrhythms, shifting odd-time arpeggios on pipa and guzheng, and syncopated Chinese opera percussion driving the pulse, Ancient Persian suona (derived from the Surnay) pierces through the texture with bright, reedy calls, while deep bass tones are created using massive Chinese gongs and layered yunluo chimes instead of any Western bass instruments, Airy whisper harmonics drift above, shimmering synth pads and reversed harp samples fill the spaces between jagged phrases, and occasional glitch fragments shatter the flow, forming a surreal labyrinth where ancestral timbres meet fractured modern rhythms in a dreamlike collision of history and abstraction,
Lyrics
哈!哈! 佛光——呃……
啊!!!
[Verse 1]
昨日初学如来神掌 (唔~)
师父看了快气炸 (哦~)
说我站姿像只鸭 (嘿呀嘿呀)
连个起手式都摆不下 (哈!)
佛光初现! (掌力却全走偏)
金顶佛灯! (结果烧到自己脸)
全力一推! (只听见手腕响)
天地不动! (我先倒在地上)
[Chorus: Epic, Heroic, Fast Tempo]
如来神掌!我勉强! (唔~)
东施效颦的模样 (哦~)
金顶佛灯点不亮 (嘿呀嘿呀)
一掌推出楣力量 (哈!)
如来神掌!我抓狂! (唔~)
佛动山河怎么晃?(哦~)
山河不动自己晃 (嘿呀嘿呀)
一脚踩空摔成伤! (哈!)
[Verse 2: Mystical, Eerie, Mid Tempo]
师父说要问迦蓝 (唔~)
结果我问成“加篮?” (哦~)
迎佛西天才第一步 (嘿呀嘿呀)
反倒送我自己上天 (哈!)
天佛降世! (结果降到隔壁村)
佛法无边! (是我鞋子飞)
掌力未发! (双手发麻)
师父叹气!
[Chorus]
如来神掌!我勉强!(唔~)
万佛朝宗我来扛 (哦~)
千个佛影没出现 (嘿呀嘿呀)
只有乌鸦头上转 (哈!)
如来神掌!像妄想!(唔~)
佛光普照谁敢挡? (哦~)
一招使出现K形 (嘿呀嘿呀)
原来是我没吃饭! (哈!)
[Bridge]
这什么佛法无边?
这什么万佛朝宗?
我看是 万掌抽风!!
师父啊师父~
这招到底是降魔,还是降我自己?
不练了不练了!
我还是回家吃泡面吧!
[Chorus:]
如来神掌!我放弃!(唔~)
师父门前扫落地 (哦~)
功夫真的不容易 (嘿呀嘿呀)
还是回家看电视 (哈!)
如来神掌!很浪漫~ (唔~)
我转行去卖鸡蛋 (哦~)
不用出掌不用烦 (嘿呀嘿呀)
如来看了也称赞 (哈!)
[Outro]
师父,在世俗间大彻大悟……
我决定……转转转
热乎的鸡蛋,一块钱两个!
