oh my baby girl, they took you at birth
but i have found you after searching
all over this earth

yes my baby girl, you are so mean
don't you know that all i want
is to be your daddy?

no, not in a weird way, not like that
but when people say nice things, i like to watch you snap
i got no fuckin' clue why you are always on the attack
but Monsanto can't grow enough corn
to keep me supplied with snacks

oh nicole, nicole, are you really sixteen?
oh nicole, nicole, why are you so mean?
who taught you how to speak so fuckin' obscene?
i really love this shit, you know what i mean?

oh my baby girl, they took you at birth
but now i have found you after searching
all over this earth

yes my baby girl, you are so mean
don't you know that all i want
is to be your daddy?

in a paternal sense, don't get it confused
i do like bitches, but little girls i refuse
i will teach you all about sue-no, show you the ways
the way you treat people has me laughing for days

oh nicole, oh nicole, what crawled up your ass?
oh nicole, oh nicole, god damn you make me laugh
oh nicole, oh nicole, don't you ever change
the world needs more of your wily ways



filling out the adoption papers now