TMP: Carolina Reapers
Cinematic fusion of 2000's era bro country with a cinematic feel. The narrator inserts drive the narrative forward. Each section about a character is sung by a different vocalist. All of the singers come together on the chorus. For instruments use instruments common to southern rock/bro-country. This needs to be performed with swagger in a major key.
TMP: Carolina Reapers
Cinematic fusion of 2000's era bro country with a cinematic feel. The narrator inserts drive the narrative forward. Each section about a character is sung by a different vocalist. All of the singers come together on the chorus. For instruments use instruments common to southern rock/bro-country. This needs to be performed with swagger in a major key.
Lyrics
Intro
“It was supposed to be a normal Saturday. Hot sauce festival, small town in North Carolina. Folks sweatin’ through their shirts, braggin’ about Scoville units. Then a Yankee bit into something he shouldn’t have and bit someone else.”
Verse 1
He came from up north, loud and proud,
Mocked the heat, drew a curious crowd.
Bit into a Reaper experimental breed,
Cooked in a shed behind the fairground feed.
Eyes went wide, then came the bite,
Turned the fest into a zombie fight.
Narration
“Authorities confirm the outbreak began with an unregulated pepper strain. Festival organizers say it was part of a limited batch labeled ‘Reaper X.’ The CDC has not issued a formal statement.”
“Most folks ran. Some froze. But a few grabbed what they had and made a stand. The National Guard armory was six blocks away. All they had to do was survive the walk.”
Chorus
Zombies and peppers in Carolina tonight,
The dead don’t dance, but they sure can bite.
Four wild souls with a crazy plan,
Fighting off doom with what’s at hand.
Zombies and peppers, yeah, we’ll make a stand.
Verse 2
Moonstone swingin’, muffins in tow,
She said, “Balance,” then let it blow.
She cracked skulls with a geode club,
“Zombies hate gluten,” she said mid-thud.
Sage bundles swinging, no time to tease,
She dropped ten dead with herbal ease.
Narration
“We believe the infected are reacting to capsaicin in unpredictable ways. It’s possible the pepper’s chemical structure triggered a neuroviral cascade. Or maybe it’s just... bad farming.”
Verse 3
Bone Collector tee, brisket in hand,
Didn’t flinch, just took a stand.
Built a flamethrower from the busted grill, laced the flame with Mace,
Lit up the dead with a hunter’s pace.
Spice rack emptied, propane rigged,
He cleared the path with a butcher’s dig.
Verse 4
Two pistols tucked, denim tight,
“Finally,” he said, “my Friday night.”
Misread the banner, thought it said prepper fest,
Showed up armed, no time to second-guess.
John Wick’d through the pepper maze,
No wasted rounds, just Southern blaze.
He’d trained for this in his backyard shed,
Now he danced with the walking dead.
Instrumental Break
TV Insert
“If they reach the armory, they’ll have access to defensive gear and communications. But the infected are fast. This isn’t Romero, it’s something else.”
Bridge
Big Ray swung ribs like war drums beat,
“Low and slow,” he said, “but death ain’t sweet.”
Cleaver cracked, sauce hit bone,
He carved a path like it was his own.
Dr. Lee stitched wounds with pepper paste,
“Keep ‘em breathin’, we ain’t got waste.”
Narration
“They made it to the armory. Barricaded the doors. The chopper was inbound. But the dead kept coming, and the Reapers didn’t blink.”
Final Chorus
Zombies and peppers in Carolina tonight,
The dead don’t dance, but they sure can bite.
Four wild souls with a crazy plan,
Fighting off doom with what’s at hand.
Zombies and peppers, yeah, we’ll make a stand.
Narration
“The National Guard confirms visual contact with survivors. Helicopter ETA: five minutes. Until then, it’s the survivors versus chaos.”
“They came for flavor. They stayed for war. And in a small town where the peppers bite back... the Reapers always win.”