(Verse 1)

Behold the elite! We are the brains and the crown,

We’re bringing the heavens to earth, coming down.

Just shut up and listen, and bliss will ensue,

We’re fixing the planet and polishing YOU!

We’ll command all the rivers to flow a bit clearer,

We’ll make the horizon appear a bit nearer.

We’re spilling the secrets, the absolute gold:

"Did you know that the winter is terribly cold?!"

Yes, distinct revelations for you we have found!

(Like, water is wet and the sky is not ground!)

(Chorus)

Listen to the Smart Ones! Listen to the Kings!

We know the reason for all living things.

We are the Shepherds, and you are the sheep,

With secrets to sell you (and none of them cheap).

So march to our rhythm and heed our decree,

For without us, you’re nothing! But with us—you’ll see.

Listen! Listen! Heed what we say!

We are the ones who will show you the way!

(Verse 2)

Now, let’s talk of money, that burden you bear,

It’s heavy and dirty and brings you despair.

So hand us the surplus! Unburden your soul!

Transferring your assets should be your main goal.

It’s spiritual cleansing! We’re helping you out!

(We need it much more than you do, there’s no doubt).

Come drink our philosophy, sweet as a rose,

We’ll tell you precisely when you should repose,

We’ll dictate your breakfast, your thoughts, and your breath,

And guide you directly from birth until death.

(Verse 3)

If you swallow our nectar and follow our rules,

If you nod when we speak and don't act like fools,

If you mimic our motions and worship our voice,

You might earn the Gift—oh, the ultimate Choice!

Not gold, and not freedom, not power or fame,

But the right to have US maybe mention your name!

We might give a nod, or a thumb in the air,

To show that your efforts were strictly simply "fair."

To earn our approval—that’s life’s highest peak!

(But don’t interrupt when the Wise People speak).

(Bridge)

You’re lost in the dark without our grand design,

You’re chaos and dust without our bottom line.

So do as we say to avoid a collapse,

Or fall into error and terrible traps!

We’re the compass, the map, and the road, and the car,

We tell you how near and we tell you how far!

(Outro)

So hope for the day, yes, just pray for the time,

When we say: "You have adequately walked in our line."

Until then—silence! And open your purse!

It could be much better, but could be much worse!

Listen to the Smart Ones!

Listen to the Greats!

We are the masters of all of your fates!

Listen! Listen! Listen to US!