You turn your back in the river

knowing I’m watching

The light drips off your skin

I don’t move

I don’t breathe

I just wait for you to turn

“turn to me / turn to me”

It’s not the bruise I want

It’s what comes after

the stillness

the reach

the release

“let go / let in”

Sequence is crucial

Touch me,

then ruin me

Don’t skip the part

where I choose it

I want to watch it happen

“I see it / I say yes”

The jacket slips off my shoulder

like it belongs there

Oh men look too long

or not at all

Either way,

I let them imagine what I taste like

taste

touch

not yours

Sequence is crucial

Touch me,

then ruin me

Don’t skip the part

where I choose it

I want to watch it happen

“I see it / I say yes”

Yeah I asked him to hit me

He laughed

like I was teasing

But I wasn’t

I just wanted to feel the *edge* of something

before I crossed it

“closer / still not enough”

It’s not the bruise I want

It’s what comes after

the stillness

the reach

the release

“let go / let in”

Sequence is crucial

Touch me,

then ruin me

Don’t skip the part

where I choose it

I want to watch it happen

“I see it / I say yes”

I’ve worn the desire

like a second skin

Let them wonder

Let them ache

I already know

what I want

“want / (yeah) want / not sorry”

I never stop watching

Even when your eyes are closed

Even when mine are

The loop isn’t punishment

It’s pleasure

to press play again

to know what’s coming

to want it anyway

I make it happen

with a look

with a breath

with nothing at all

I ask

and you listen

Or you don’t

It doesn’t change the ending

I touch it

I name it

I become it

slowly

again…

again

I want

Come in

I'm ready

come